kitchen table math, the sequel: justice & revenge at Costco

Friday, December 19, 2008

justice & revenge at Costco

Ed and C. were just at Costco, which was jam-packed in anticipation of the snowstorm. Snow began to fall while they were there, and everyone decided to get out at the same time, producing an enormous traffic jam in the basement of the parking structure, where a one-lane ramp is the only way up and out. Four lines of cars were trying to merge onto the one lane of the ramp, and everyone was honking. Which did nothing to speed things along. Ed said it was like trying to get out of Yankee Stadium at the end of a game. In the snow, with honking.

One joker jumped the queue, driving outside the lanes of cars to the front of the line, where he started nosing his way in. The drivers up front, who had just spent 45 minutes waiting (and honking) to get to the ramp, were determined to keep him out; people were so ticked-off at the guy that they were rolling down their windows and yelling at him. But he was driving an old, beat-up car and he finally pushed his way in, probably because someone driving a new, non-beat-up car didn't have the sense of conviction it takes to play chicken in the basement of the Costco parking structure.*

So now he's made it into the front part of the line -- and he won't let anyone else in. The entire huge humungous mass of cars has been lined up and merging and honking for almost an hour, and THIS ONE GUY not only cuts the line but, once he's cut the line, proceeds to violate the norm that says when you finally reach the front of the line you take turns getting onto the ramp.

Ed said people were beside themselves, yelling and gesturing and honking and just basically collectively losing their minds. But of course there was nothing they could do about it; he was where he was, at the front of the line, and he could do what he wanted to do.

Suddenly the woman in front of the guy rolled down her window, leaned out, and snapped a picture of the guy's license plate.

He went nuts! Rolled down his window, started screaming and yelling at her. He was freaking out, Ed said.

The woman rolled her down her window, leaned out, and took his picture again.


* I have it! I relish playing chicken with line-jumpers. In my car or out of my car. I speak as a person who attended World Fairs at an early age.

10 comments:

Catherine Johnson said...

That's the kind of thing I would have the nerve to do (taking a picture of the guy's license plate, not cutting the line), but I would never be able to think of it.

Catherine Johnson said...

I have a 21st century math problem related to this post.

Remind me to put it up.

Ben Calvin said...

You mean line-jumping isn't a 21st century skill?

Catherine Johnson said...

lolllll !

Leaning out your car window and taking a photograph of the line-jumper's license plate is the 21st century skill.

Jumping the line in the first place is soooooo 20th century.

Anonymous said...

* I have it! I relish playing chicken with line-jumpers.

Ahh youth. Once you get old (I mean really old), you just let them go ahead. My following distance is right for my reaction time. "He must be in a hurry..."

--rocky

Doug Sundseth said...

I'd have been tempted to just stop my car if I were in front of that guy. Open question whether I would have gotten out and locked the doors.

But then I learned to ski in Germany, so I know from line jumping.

Catherine Johnson said...

Once you get old (I mean really old), you just let them go ahead.

Don't say that!

I am an inveterate not-letter-inner.

In fact, Ed and I had an altercation over this very issue on our last trip back from NJ.

That's the math problem I have to get posted.

Catherine Johnson said...

But then I learned to ski in Germany, so I know from line jumping.

Yeah??

I wonder which is more intense: Montreal World's Fair or ski line in Germany?

Catherine Johnson said...

Actually, stopping in front of him for a couple of minutes would have been a very good idea.

People were so focused on this guy I bet the cars in the other 3 lanes would have started letting the cars behind him merge into their lanes.

Catherine Johnson said...

Ed said the woman was super-calm, especially the second time she took his car's picture.

heh